Wednesday, August 24, 2005
I'm sure he'll put the award up on his
mantel, right next to his '80s headband
You think Norah Jones has a tush like that? Please.
As a longtime Springsteen fan, I've been harboring what you might call a deep resentment that Bruce was denied his Album of the Year grammy. And not just for "The Rising" in 2003 -- I'm still smarting over the stunning 1985 loss to Lionel Richie. ("Hello, is it cheesy fake R&B pop songs you're looking for ..." No, I'm not bitter.)
So, taking whatever consolation I can, I'm happy to report that SPIN magazine has apparently honored Springsteen by choosing his butt as one of the 25 "most incredible" rock star body parts. I didn't see any of Lionel Richie's or Norah Jone's body parts on that list, and believe me, I looked. And so what if the judges were probably basing their opinion on Springsteen's '80s butt? I'm sure his current butt is doing just fine, thank you.
Unfortunately Springsteen's butt didn't top the list; that honor went to Madonna's navel, which, according to SPIN writer Marc Spitz, is "what first marked her as a mainstream provocateur." And yet when I gyrate my navel in public, I'm threatened with incarceration. Life is unfair.
Anyway, congratulations to Bruce. Even though I can't say his butt has bettered my life in any particular way, I'd still rather have it honored than some lesser artist's butt. Meanwhile, if he doesn't win a Grammy for "Devils & Dust," I'm going to Norah Jones' house and gyrate my navel at her stupid piano.