Friday, June 24, 2005

Instead, they recommended
he just inject steroids directly
into his cranium

Well, it was bound to happen: South Korea's baseball authorities have banned a star pitcher from wearing frozen cabbage leaves in his cap to keep cool during games. This could be a crushing blow to the cabbage industry, which was already reeling from corn beef's announcement that it was pursuing a solo career.

"Since it has become a controversy, we decided to set a limit on the boundaries of foreign substances," said a Korean Baseball Association spokesman. With that in mind, other items banned from the pitcher's mound included:
  • Frozen spinach;
  • Frozen lettuce;
  • Frozen radicchio;
  • Frozen pizza (French bread or standard crust);
  • That huge pork roast that you bought because it was on sale but that, let's face it, you're never going to cook;
  • Fudgsicles, popsicles, other miscellaneous sicles;
  • Anything that's been left in the freezer so long it's developed a fuzzy, frozen skin;
  • Gwyneth Paltrow.


-c said...

Think they also banned cucumber voodoo strike-out dolls and brocolli foot BO busters.
Just stumbled in here, and really enjoyed! Cheers!

the Witch said...

What's a Bo buster?

Anonymous said...

Fudgecicles can be stored in a number of places and always improve performance.

neena maiya (guyana gyal) said...

Why didn't he just freeze his cap?

immixmarketer said...

Big time laughs dude.
I'll be looking for updates.

Icylyrics said...

Madd funny, stumbled in and so glad I did.

Anonymous said...

great blog, but c'mon, who can resist a pork roast on sale?!

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