Good news: Scientists have discovered the existence of "good" bacteria that actually fights bad breath and stinky feet! So all of you sucking down Listerine Oral Care Strips like they were jellybeans, cut it out -- the bad breath- and stinky feet-fighting bacteria you kill may be your own.
According to CBS News, "More studies on the topic may lead to a natural way of reducing bad breath and smelly feet." No word yet on whether those studies will be able to determine why people in need of such remedies always sit next to me on planes.
But as scientists work to harness the power of good bacteria until millions of them can be held on little leashes and trained to attack and destroy all things stinky, you'll have to come up with another way to keep from offending people in your general proximity. For instance, "practicing good hygiene may help."
Ha ha! No, seriously, I'm figuring a needle in the stomach might be good.