Wednesday, November 09, 2005

That's what you get for
taking a ride with Billy Joel

Poor Paris Hilton. First there was the sex tape, then the big fight with Nicole Richie, then the breakup with the other Paris ... No wait, first was the hamburger ad controversy, then the breakup ... wait, somewhere in there was her stealing her own sex video. So it was the sex tape, the fight with Nicole, the hamburger ad, the sex video stealing, the other Paris breakup ... Oh, forget it.

Anyway, now she's been caught on tape in a car crash outside a Hollywood nightclub. Oh, Paris, when will you give up this wild, fly-by-night lifestyle and settle down, have some kids, go through a messy, public divorce, pose naked in Playboy and star in a reality show in which you and your filthy rich kids go clubbing together? And also, when will we stop caring?

I vote for right now.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

We can probably stop caring when you and others stop writing about it. Now the real crime in this case isn't the accident but the crazed paparazzi. They are way out of control...

Underachiever said...

I can't wait till she gets fat. Which in Paris Hilton's case is 92 lbs.

Undr

PS WWTRD?= What Would Tara Reid Do?

PPS yeah, she would have at least side-swiped half a dozen people.

PPS Anony: Are you the other Paris?

BlueBirdsFly said...

i guess, we will be past caring when they turn fat, grow old or become broke...whichever comes first.

Adam said...

You're on to something anon.

When I worked for CNC, I often saw Peter running after Limos with his digital camera, hoping to get that elusive snapshot of Mayor Scanlon rushing out the backdoor of city hall into the arms of Sophia Loren -

yes, for the Paris Hilton fiascos, I blame you, Peter Chianca

MuppetLord said...

er...has anyone ever cared?

Garrett Royce said...

I wake up every day with the ultimate goal to completely in no way, shape, or form to care, think of caring, or even think about thinking of caring for any of the Hilton offspring or any other rich whelp for that matter.

smudge said...

Yeah the paparazzi are a little intense aren't they? Any solutions? For this particular situation what they really needed was a paparazzi plow.
http://www.plowsunlimited.com/images/pushplows/snoway_MT_large.jpg

Note the clear blade of the plow so that the media can continue to take photos while being moved gently to the curb thus not denying their rights as free citizens. This particular model is also ideal because many of today's celebrities own at least one of the larger and more trendier SUV's such as the Escalade which should have no problem moving at least a dozen photographers at one time. Enough to make a smooth path for returning to the road. Consult with your local authorities on the precise height placement of the blade to avoid damage to local roads.

Barnze said...

Another Anna nicole in the making!