Wednesday, August 24, 2005

I'm sure he'll put the award up on his
mantel, right next to his '80s headband


You think Norah Jones has a tush like that? Please.

As a longtime Springsteen fan, I've been harboring what you might call a deep resentment that Bruce was denied his Album of the Year grammy. And not just for "The Rising" in 2003 -- I'm still smarting over the stunning 1985 loss to Lionel Richie. ("Hello, is it cheesy fake R&B pop songs you're looking for ..." No, I'm not bitter.)

So, taking whatever consolation I can, I'm happy to report that SPIN magazine has apparently honored Springsteen by choosing his butt as one of the 25 "most incredible" rock star body parts. I didn't see any of Lionel Richie's or Norah Jone's body parts on that list, and believe me, I looked. And so what if the judges were probably basing their opinion on Springsteen's '80s butt? I'm sure his current butt is doing just fine, thank you.

Unfortunately Springsteen's butt didn't top the list; that honor went to Madonna's navel, which, according to SPIN writer Marc Spitz, is "what first marked her as a mainstream provocateur." And yet when I gyrate my navel in public, I'm threatened with incarceration. Life is unfair.

Anyway, congratulations to Bruce. Even though I can't say his butt has bettered my life in any particular way, I'd still rather have it honored than some lesser artist's butt. Meanwhile, if he doesn't win a Grammy for "Devils & Dust," I'm going to Norah Jones' house and gyrate my navel at her stupid piano.

8 comments:

Underachiever said...

Underachiever said...
What a coincidence, I am in a bluegrass band. Our name is the Gyrating Navels. We won the "The best group of double chinned idiots assembled in one place" award. It's an honor.

As far as Bruce's butt helping him get a grammy is concerned. It would be a conflict of interest seeing that his butt has a different agent than Bruce. Coincidently, though, His butt has the same agent as Norah Jones' elbow.

Undr(greatest pinky-toe in rock)

grody jo-dee said...

so exactly why are you obsessed with the award for bruce's butt?

Chianca At Large said...

I should clarify that I am only interested in Bruce's butt for its musical ability and have no opinion about its aesthetic value vis-a-vis other butts. Thank you.

grody jo-dee said...

i wasn't aware that butts had musical ability...can i apply that to acting ability as well? "well, honey, i was checking out his butt's acting ability."

Terri said...

Well yes, Bruce's butt was very talented in the 80's.
But so, apparently, was Sigue Sigue Sputnik.
What were we thinking?!!!!

Aunt Nancy said...

Make sure to wear a water-cooled bikini when gyrating your navel at Norah Jones' piano.

Rima said...

Except that you can't really see his butt in that picture. I see some loose jeans with a lot of stuff in the pockets, covering any hint of butt that might be hiding within. Show me a real butt shot and I'll think about it.

My brother's butt has musical ability but we try to discourage that.

Zen Angel said...

Madonna's navel over Elvis' pelvis? That's just wrong.