'Tis the season -- no, not for holiday cheer, although I've heard tell of that too. I'm referring to the annual announcement of the wackiest warning label! Yes, it's here already.
And this year's is a keeper: A label on a small tractor that warns, "Danger: Avoid Death." I like how it has almost a homespun quality, like something your old Pappy might have imparted from his front-porch rocker before your first go-around with the family thresher.
And it of course serves its ultimate purpose, which is to avoid a lawsuit. Not so all those other products that don't include a warning against their death-causing properties, namely ... well, anything that can be half-swallowed, dropped on your head from a great height or accidentally inserted into an artery.
The other winners include "Do not iron while wearing shirt" and "Do not put child in bag," but I'm still waiting for the one that says "Danger: You are an idiot." Actually, that would make a good T-shirt.